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12-Dec-2017 21:33

Woman B: Twenty-seven and he recently turned 42 (we're still together). We discovered we had a lot of interests in common and became good friends. Most of the men I dated more casually at the time were in their 30s. It also made me feel special — this man seemed so much more worldly than the men my age, and the fact that he was interested in me seemed too good to be true. Woman D: Originally I think I was flattered that somebody who had experienced so much of life was interested in me.

Woman B: I rented a flat in the backyard of his then-girlfriend. But I knew he was probably 10 years older than me and that was a little bit of the attraction, because I thought that he would be older and more settled with none of the bullshit that you have in your 20s.

As a 30-year-old woman, I understand their hesitations now.

As an 18-year-old, I thought they were close-minded.

Woman B: It has very little impact, although it does lead to some amusing jokes at times. Because we worked together we were able to spend time together and I would come home from school on the weekends.

He is a film nerd and usually mentions the year a film came out. " It's now at the point where he preempts me saying that. Once we were a more formal couple things became much harder.

My cousin actually said, "Forty-five is the new 30!

" My mother was less OK with it, but I expected that. Woman D: My family, especially my father, were very much against the relationship. My friends thought it was "gross" and it took them nearly all four years of college to warm up to my boyfriend.

If anything, his emotional maturity has allowed us to have those tough conversations about sex.

I think that because I was 18, he had expectations that I would be wild and crazy and open to anything.

There were things that he expected with his party lifestyle that I felt very uncomfortable with, but would ignore my instinct and go along with to make him happy.

I think it was a thrill for him and gave him a chance to relive some of his adolescence.

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Would you say that you are more attracted to older men than younger men, or men in your age group? I've also always been attracted to power dynamics and to the idea of inhabiting a more sexually submissive role.

My theory is that the two are linked and that the age difference facilitates a dom/sub dynamic.



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